Saying Sorry

School leaders have really hard jobs and even effective school leaders make lots of mistakes. And that means you need to say sorry frequently. To put it even more strongly, you need to be good at saying sorry if you're going to be good at the job.

• You need to be good at knowing when you messed up. 
• You need to be good at getting over your own (large) ego 
• You need to be good at not making excuses, hedging your apology, or doing the famous, "I apologize if I have offended you..."
• You need to be good at genuinely showing that you care that someone has been hurt or wronged  
• You need to be good at saying some version of "I messed up" or "It's my fault and no one else's" or "I apologize that this happened and I'll make sure it doesn't happen again"

Speaking from a few examples from just the past few weeks, being upfront about making a mistake and giving a sincere apology can almost instantly transform a tense situation or repair hurt feelings. Of course, an apology with no change in behavior or without action steps won't count for much for very long - an apology is just a starting point and not the end. But you need to start by saying "sorry".